Mommy needs a Time Out

Why is it when we become mommies that no one tells us about "mommy time outs"? The ones we arent sent to, the ones we run to ...you know in hiding? Its 10am you're not dressed, probably dont smell good because the baby spit up on you at some point (yesterday? today? .... dont remember), you have only had one sip of that precious coffee (which is cold now), your three year old (Frack... Frick is at school) is in a constant need this morning and the baby seems to be vetoing morning naps (who gave the 11month old political power???). You have successfully gotten Max and Ruby on the tv, gotten your cleaning supplies out and there he is again "mommy"..... ok got him a snack back to hmmm what was i doing? o yeah cleaning. Got the bathroom clean, cleaning supplies on steps, into living room, mission: clean up toys. Almost done. Enter three year old: "mommy...." Ok juice in cup, lid on... losing patience but keeping it cool, kiss on head, prayer under breath..... back to??? Living Room! Yes, ok done. Breakfast dishes cleaned up, in dishwasher... no detergent. Why? Because it isnt pay day yet and you cant go to the grocery store until it is. Great, handwash... "mommy....." YES? Ok deep breath, not his fault... he's three.... get out lincoln logs (blinking logs as he refers to them) back to dishes... up the elbows in soap.... hear the baby. Ok finish up get the baby...."mommy..." Alright do they see that we are about to lose it and then think "lets see how fast we can make mommy crack?" Mommy is going to the bathroom... knock knock "mommy..." O Dear Lord please grant me the serenity.... Inhale Exhale Inhale Exhale... I'm hiding in the bathroom....seriously? the bathroom? And to think that's not even the sad part... the sad part is it ISNT working! Sigh... it's only 11am....